I read a blog post by Rev. Joan Grey yesterday that spoke to me. Read it here: https://joansgray.wordpress.com/2015/01/24/whats-it-all-for/ It’s title is “What’s it all For?” and she writes about being a leader of a church. While my concerns aren’t with being pastor of a church, I can’t help but ask this question of myself. Joan writes:

“After I lived with this question for a while what emerged for me was the phrase ‘conformed to the image of Christ.’ (Rom. 8:29) The fruit of a faithful church is people being conformed, even better transformed, into being like Jesus. And transformed people can transform communities. And transformed communities can transform the world…… When it begins to happen, the Holy Spirit will be managing and transforming us instead. What we can do is to ask different questions, such as ‘What does God want us to be doing now?’”

This is the question I am asking myself. I need to live in the present and not worry about the future. I ask questions such as, “What is God calling me to do with my life? “ I look at what other people are doing and get mad about what I’m not able to do which tends to hurl me off the cliff into depression. When I fall off that cliff into the darkness, I’m in big trouble! But even in the darkness, the moon shines brightly. Seeing the moon reminds me that God is there. God is always there, whether I believe it or not.

My current frustration is my inability to drive at night. I had to miss a choir rehearsal last week because I didn’t have a ride and this week isn’t looking much better. The American way of life often means being in control and having complete independence. This isn’t really true and those of us who have disabilities know this. I thought I’d already learned this lesson but it appears I need a reminder.

So my question I’m asking God this week is: “With my limitations, are you calling me to do right now?”

If you are a brain injury survivor or have another disability, are their things you would like to be doing but you cannot? How do you handle this?