As I come out of the wilderness, my tendency is to begin participating in too many things. This is a symptom of much of upper class, upper- middle class and middle class American culture. As our society becomes more stratified this is happening right now under Mr. Trump – although it began happening much earlier. As others have said, our current president only brought things that have been occurring, to the surface.
I saw Michael Moore’s new movie Fahrenheit 11.9 yesterday. Whether you like Moore or not – many folks do not – you need to see this movie for it describes exactly what is happening today in our country. It frightened me and I hope it frightens others to action.
Back to the wilderness and the path “in the mighty waters (Isaiah 43:16a CEB) ” stretching before me. I asked Michael to help me remember not to do too much. I need him to tell me gently perhaps in the form of a question – not what sounds like an order – or I will rebel. “I don’t care what he thinks! I can do all this!” I’ll think to myself. When I am angry at him, I’m really angry at my cognitive fatigue and over-stimulation issues. I long to be as I was before but my path through the mighty waters, has changed.
This changed path means I have to make choices or I’ll over-do it. Yesterday I worked outside in the garden and it wore me out. So many sights, sounds, and thoughts overloaded me. Afterwards, I put on headphones and listened to Yo-Yo Ma perform the cello concerto in b minor. I closed my eyes and rested in the music.
I did try to rest without listening to the music, but I couldn’t stop thoughts from invading my mind. “I need to make a list of the plants in the garden to know what they need to thrive.” A neighbor in his 70’s walked by me as I worked and told me he had recently fallen and broke several ribs. I clicked into my caring mode – one of the hazards of being a minister – and told him not to walk too far since his broken ribs needed to heal which meant sitting quietly.
It doesn’t take too much to challenge my cognition these days. Just being out in the front yard was all it took. I needed a way to focus on something else and the concerto did the trick.
I will continue walking this path through the wilderness with God by my side.